Bloop Finds Its Way

Hi there! My name is Bloop! I am a shapeless mass that floats through time and space. I’m not what you would call human, sometimes I do wish I got to be though. Imagine having opposable thumbs! I don’t really know how long I have been doing this but every 20 years or so something shifts and I start collecting the essence of a different person. Isn’t that exciting! I guess this doesn’t really explain exactly what I am, but the truth is I really don’t know. I guess you could say that I am an amalgamation of feelings and memories. Humans project these onto me especially after experiencing significant life altering moments. I believe you people call these core memories? So I just float here by myself, until one of you manifests these thoughts on to me.

What was it like when I was first born? It was awkward if you ask me, I vaguely remember an environment that your people would call college, is that how you pronounce it? Ah yes thank you, college. So much growth condensed into such a short timeline. You were so young and you thought you had all the answers, so idealistic before you were thrust into the real world and you realized you actually didn’t know that much. I remember all your friends too! They were wonderful! You made them your home, your family who would eventually stand the test of time, but you didn’t know that yet. Life wasn’t fair to you all back then but you did your best. I wish you paused more during these moments, just to take everything in and appreciate all the memories you were creating. You’ve never been able to replicate this moment of your life, not really.

And then all of it came to an end. We couldn’t see our friends anymore and everyone had to go their separate ways to start their lives. It wasn’t sad, it’s what you all wanted but there was the realization and acceptance that a chapter was shutting but another was opening. You flew into adulthood with all you had! So eager and excited! The remnants of that college confidence carried you through your first few months of real adulthood. You didn’t have your old friends with you but that’s okay, you all tried in your own ways to remain close. Plus you were an adult! In the real world now! You would make new friends and keep trying. You dove into the early 20s chaos of staying out too late, trauma bonding, making stupid decisions, discovering careless connections hoping that something would last so the gaping hole that erected after you left college could finally be filled.

For a while it worked, you started finding your people and became enclosed in a community. But sadly, nothing ever stays the same. There was a really dark period, I don’t know what happened or why it happened but you couldn’t see your friends anymore. Everyone had to stay at home and stay inside, people were getting sick, millions were dying, nobody knew when it would end. I was scared. You didn’t have your people, and everyone felt so far away, all those months you spent building all came crumbling down all around you. All that work for what? I thought this would be our new future, a lonely life in an echo chamber of our own creation with a population of one. Well technically two, you and your friend Bloop. 

Then things started to get better? I think. You were still technically in your early 20s but I don’t think you would be able to get all this time lost. You were stuck. You lost some of that college confidence and energy. It was harder now for you to make friends, everyone was inside their houses too, nobody knew how to come back out and everything was just uncomfortable. I didn’t like it but we had to find our connections again! Kind of like a game! It took some time but you found them, you actually found them! I knew you could do it! And they were so wonderful, they filled the empty space you didn’t know exsted, how did it get so big after all this time? You were going out again, it wasn’t quite the chaos of your early 20s but this was nice. It was constant, you took your time, you were laying foundations and building on your excitement. I miss these people. There were so many laughs, so many moments to practice being vulnerable and, well you didn't succeed all the time but at least you tried! Did we find connections that could rival our college family? I don’t want to get ahead of myself but I think we did! Imagine the future! Imagine all the adventures and all the milestones you get to experience with these people and they’ll be here for all of it! 

I noticed a change in you during this time. You kept thinking about the future and death for some reason. Wanting to have people to go through life with you with the goal of not dying alone, I don’t know why you’re thinking of this. Life is long with so many unpredictable twists and turns, very few things are constant and things rarely stay the same. I would know! Bloop has been manifested by many humans before you and history always repeats itself.

You went through another big change. You won’t be in this environment you carefully and intentionally created for yourself. But you think things will be the same, you’ve gone through change before, this would be a similar event and you will land on your two feet again. Bloop wishes I could have prepared you more. It was hard. The community you built wasn’t the same, the distance was just too much. Bloop is sorry, I see the emotions radiating off of your body shooting directly at me like daggers trained on their target. It hurts. Everything you’ve worked for and built for a second time was destroyed right before your eyes. Bloop thinks the most painful part is you really thought this would be it, all the effort you made to fill the hole would pay off and the hole would stay filled forever.

Do you want to know what Bloop has learned from all the time I have been alive? One of the few constants in life is that change is inevitable. Leaves change, our environment changes, and we change. Naturally the people around us will change too. It’s so hard to keep up with the constant motion in this labyrinth that we call life so we choose the things that are easy. This applies to the people who come and go in our life too. Their world is also in a constant state of disruptive motion that they choose simple ways to still the motion. Sometimes this is with you, and other times it’s without you. Another thing that Bloop has learned is that life is so long! We get to meet so many wonderful people. The people who get us to try sushi, the people who inspire us to be vulnerable, the people we’ll walk through the ends of life with, the people who randomly start to root for us, the people who come and pick us up from the airport! Bloop can see your efforts and the loneliness that can sometimes feel inescapable. You have not met all of the people in your lifetime who will fill this hole and keep you warm. Let’s go and find them, Bloop is rooting for you!

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